When my kids were little, and routines, rhythms and rituals ruled the world, we had a fabulous Autumn/Winter Friday routine set up. The kids would come home from school and play for a short while until 6 o’clock. Then it was bathtime: I’d herd them up the stairs to the bath, where either I supervised them through a bubble bath (I have shots of all three of them in one bath full of bubbles and laughing) or, when they were old enough, they’d take turns to bathe and dress in clean pyjamas ready to come downstairs.

Friday Night was Movie Night, and they always got to eat their evening meal on a picnic rug in front of the TV. It was (and still is, mostly) the only night we didn’t all sit down as a family at the table together. They had pizza, or chicken pieces, hotdogs, burgers or pies and chips. And they had a movie, chosen in rotation and often a repeat.

They had their own favourites (my eldest had almost a year when Eragon was his film of choice, while the Daughter regularly chose the original Italian Job) and we would slip the DVD in and watch in near silence. Dessert, sometimes sweets but often a bowl of ice cream with toppings, followed and the three of them were happy and tired by the end.

My Dear Husband and I used to eat separately, a candlelit dinner that I cooked and eaten with the only beer or wine we used to drink. Peter would take the three up to bed and supervise bedtime teeth brushing and stories, while I cooked hunter’s chicken, steak and chips or (my personal favourite) paella cooked from an easycook bag.

Movie Night faded or slipped once they were teenagers and especially when Daughter started having a Life. Even in Lockdown we were not dedicated to making Friday a family time, mostly because every day was a family occasion together.

During the summer, I took a hard look at the routines we’ve slipped into as five distinct and different adults in the house. It’s far too easy to live separate lives with phones, laptops and external pressures to bear. And yet, the times when we found a really good movie, when we sat down to watch Bullet Train (excellent, funny, worth it to hear my sons discuss Japanese something or other in cinematographic terms) or to enjoy The Mummy (Sarah’s comfort watch: we could all take a part, I think, and yet we will all watch it again. And again.) gave me nostalgic vibes for a simpler time of food, absorbtion and discussion.

And when, idling over a family meal this summer, we discussed movies we hadn’t seen but were aware we should have really, an idea was born. Why not watch the classics that any of us had missed together?

So, Friday Night is Movie Night. Again. Less a re-release, more a sequel set 20 years after the original. I have the list, compiled over a couple of good meals and a few evening discussions, and we are working our way through it. One movie, every Friday as long as we’re home, and everybody watching. We started last week, with Chinatown, a movie I had always managed somehow not to watch. And we’re watching The Whale this week, because second Son James requested it. We no longer sit on a picnic blanket eating hotdogs, although we still eat burgers and pizza off our knees because Friday is the only night we don’t eat sat at the table. And Peter and I don’t have candlelit Date Night any more: we’re enjoying the presence of our children before they grow up, move away, start their own Friday Nights with partners, children or Friends. We’re enjoying the moment, creating memories. One day, when we’re old and grey, I hope Peter and I will look back and say “Remember when we watched The Seven Samurai, and David explained all the significant symbolism? Or when James took us through the whole of Myasaki’s back catalogue?” And perhaps when it’s only one of us eating every meal off a lap tray, they’ll smile and say “Fridays. That was our family night. A movie, a meal and a lot of fun.”

How to Hygge the British Way is my gift to the world. I don’t get paid for writing it, I’m not in it for the kudos, financial rewards, to become an influencer, work with brands or otherwise make any money from the blog. That’s why there are no ads, and any products I mention and recommend have either been gifted to me or bought by me with my everyday wages or donations from supporters. Every book I review has been bought and read by me, unless stated otherwise.

I do get a couple of pennies each time someone buys from the Amazon links on my page, as an Amazon Affiliate, but otherwise if you’d like to support me, I like to give something back in return. That’s why I write books. It always feels good if you get a book back in return for some money. You can find a full list of my books at my Author’s Page on Amazon, but especially recommended for this time of year are:

Cosy Happy Hygge: Setting up a rhythm to life and rituals to enjoy it to make for a more balanced life that handles waves and storms better. Lent is a season of rituals and resets. The book has small and easy ways to make your life flow with grace and happiness, which lead to more hygge.

Happier: Probably my most personal book, it’s the story of how I used hygge and the little things in life to help boost my happiness. I still go back and reread to remind myself what I need to do to be a happy human. And it’s always the little things.

Is it too early to think ahead? My Christmas books are always available: Have Yourself a Happy Hygge Christmas is a good place to start, on how to make the season cosier, happier. Celebrating a Contagious Christmas was written during covid year, but has useful advice on celebrating when times are hard anyway and Enjoying a Self-Care Christmas is a short e-book on keeping Christmas simpler, easier and better for you, your waistline and your budget. It even includes 25+ suggestions for self-care activities over Christmas, as simple as sipping tea, keeping a list journal or lighting a candle. Bigger is not always better for Christmas.

I’m currently working on two book projects: I have a hankering to rewrite 50 Ways to Hygge the British Way, so it’s not available at the moment, but even dearer to my heart and my next stated aim is to finish and publish my next book, Simple Plus Cosy = Hygge. It will be about homemaking and how the home we create shapes the hygge we have. Hopefully it will be finished by the end of summer/autumn/winter.

If you’d like to support me, but don’t want to buy a book, I have a Paypal.Me account as Hygge Jem. Every little helps, so even a few pence goes towards the books, goods and courses I use and recommend on the site. I’m grateful for every little bit that brings me closer to my dream of full-time writing, and I know I couldn’t still be writing if it weren’t for the support of many readers and friends out there. Thank you all for every little bit of support, emotional, physical and financial, you give me.

If you’ve enjoyed this article, don’t forget to share it or save it so others can enjoy reading, thinking about and living hygge as well.

The photo between post and promotions is a photo I took in Amsterdam. Every day at about 4pm we stopped sightseeing and found a Brown Bar, small pubs in the city that sell a wider range of beer than we see in most bars here. A small beer each, a view through the window or just people watching. It was a real chance to slow down. My only issue now is how to capture that feeling without the beer in this country. Coffee? Afternoon tea? Home or coffee shop? I’ll find a way.